I'm scared....

John 14: 23-29

In my previous life, I traveled a ton for work.  And if you spend any amount of time traveling by air, you know you get the opportunity to see and experience some unique stuff.  Medical research sounds vast, but you find that everyone runs in the same circles and you always wind up running into the same people.  And like birds of a feather who flock together, human nature leads us to a state of commiseration where we share stories of travel nightmares in an almost competitive nature.  There were stories of missed runways and wrong airports, failed engines and horrid seatmates…but the one story that trumped them all….

After a flight from Atlanta to Los Angeles landed, there was a 50 minute layover before the plane departed again, on to Hawaii.  For those going on with the plane, the pilot announced that they were welcome to deplane and stretch their legs, etc., before the already lengthy flight finished.  Everyone took advantage of this break, with the exception of a blind man and his service dog.  The pilot noticed him as he walked by and offered to help the man, but the man declined, but said “my dog could use a break”.  So picture this:  passengers crowded around the entrance of the jet bridge, and off walks the pilot, dark sunglasses on, seeing eye dog right beside him. 

Feat took control!  With screams and cries people scattered, flooding the customer service desks of other airlines desperate to change flights; one woman even fainted in the middle of the aisle. 

Fear is a natural human response…it’s a part of our everyday lives.  Perhaps more so for some than others, but we all deal with it at some point.

Political corruption, discord and strong arming; peace be with you. 

Hatred, prejudice, racial profiling; peace be with you.

Prolife vs prochoice, men vs women, young vs old; peace be with you.

Rich vs poor, republican vs democrat, us vs them; peace be with you.

Rape, assault, abuse of power; peace be with you.

Global warming, tornadoes, floods; peace be with you.

War, suicide bombings, nuclear threat; peace be with you.

School shootings, murder, state sponsored executions; peace be with you.

Hunger, homelessness, unacceptable living conditions; peace be with you.

Measles, cancer, HIV; peace be with you. 

These are some of the many, many things that spark fear deep within us.  These are things that cause that fear to grip our hearts, to creep into the very fibers of our being.  These are things that cause fear to control us.  Where there is fear, there is no peace.  Fear brings anxiety, worry, apprehension, dread, restlessness, panic, tension…all of which are the antithesis of peace.

In the lesson in John’s Gospel this morning, Jesus tells His disciples:  Peace I leave you, my peace I give you.”.  To understand why Jesus might say this to His disciples, we need to look at the 14^th chapter of John in its whole.  The chapter begins with Jesus’ words, “Do not let your hearts be troubled.”  John starts this chapter with Christ’s words of comfort, and we pick up today with a second set of words of comfort.  Jesus and his disciples are gathered around the table.  He has washed their feet.  He has taken the bread, he has given thanks for it, he has broken it, and he has given it to them.  Likewise, he has taken the cup, he has given thanks for it, and he has given it to them, both with instruction to continue this in remembrance of him.  Something was different with this routine, yearly observance.  There was a vein of tension and fear in the air.  You can almost feel the suspicion of the disciples; what is he doing, they ask.  He tells them he is going away.  The fear and suspicion turns to shock, and disbelief; the fear remains, and begins to grow.  “I am leaving”, he tells them, “I am leaving to make a new home for you, and I will come back for you and will get you, and you will be with me again”. 

I wonder, then, how long the silence held.  How do you respond to that?  A million thoughts and questions flood your thought space…then someone speaks up, asking probably the biggest question on everyone’s mind: when you come back, how will you know us and how will we know you?

So Jesus tells them how.  I will come back and know those who are mine by those who love me, and I know you love me when you keep my word, and those who love me and keep my word will be loved also by my Father (God the Father), and we will make our home with them. 

That’s a little bit scary.  That’s actually a whole lot scary.  That’s terrifying. 

Raise your hand if you know without a shadow of a doubt you’ve kept Jesus’ word, without fail….  (no one should raise their hand).

Yeah…me either.  But these words of Christ here are kind of ambiguous if you think about them.  So we have to Love God, keep the word of Christ…but how do we do that?  How do we keep the word of Jesus?  How do we show love to God?  How do we show God the Father and God the Son that we are the people…the people who seek to have a home with them?  These are, I’m sure, the same questions thought swirling around the room that dry, dusty night. 

What are the teachings of Christ?  What is the word we are supposed to keep?  If you take all the teachings of Christ, the metanarrative is easy to see:  the teaching of Jesus is love.  It’s love over, and over again.  It’s love on top of love.  It’s a heaping measure of love, shaken and pressed down.  It’s love God, love your neighbor, and love yourself.  Love the earth, love the animals, love all of creation.  Love again, and again, and again. 

That’s all?  That’s easy!  We’ve totally got this…or at least I do!  No worries, here.

I don’t have to love the people who don’t look like me, right?  But, their skin is a different color.  They married outside of their race, and I’m pretty sure the Bible warns us against that….

Oh…I have to love them too?  I can love them but be disgusted by them right?  What’s that…I can’t?  Really?

What about these immigrants?  Coming into my country, getting on welfare I pay for, and they won’t even learn my language!

Jesus didn’t mean them.  I loved them just fine before they came to this land…my land….

But they take our jobs, and they get everything free!  But….

(Frustration)

What about that woman who’s had 3 abortions, the couple down the street who are in an “unconventional” relationship that looks different than mine, the stinky homeless man always begging for money, people in the military, human traffickers, Muslims, millennials, hippies….

I CAN’T LOVE EVERYONE!!!!!!!!  I CAN’T DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!

“I am sending you a helper”, Jesus tells them.  I am leaving you, but I am not leaving you alone.  And here we see the third part of the Holy Trinity, God the Holy Spirit.  This is one of those few times Jesus actually speaks of the three parts of God and their relationship to each other.

The Advocate, the Helper, the Guide…the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name; the Spirit will teach you everything you need to know, and will remind you of my words.  When we get a little too full of ourselves, it’s the Spirit that reminds us that we are to empty ourselves.  When we put ourselves first, our needs, our wants, our desires, it’s the Spirit that reminds us that those who are last will be first.  When our culture, our society, and our opinions and views, regardless  of how well or poorly formed begin to drift into our ability to love, it’s this same Spirit that reminds us to love, helps us to love, gives us the courage to love and guides us to service in love.  IF…if we listen.

We must.  Accepting Christ and the gift of salvation, while crucial, is only the beginning.  Our journey doesn’t end when we affirm our faith and become followers of Christ; it’s only the beginning.  Jesus tells his disciples here that my Father and I will know you by your keeping of my word.  Not by our baptism, not by our conversion…by our discipleship.  By our living a life that emulates Christ, and his generosity and self-sacrificing love.

That doesn’t bring me peace.  That troubles my heart.  Heaps and heaps of trouble, fear, doubt, questioning, and certainty that I’ve completely missed the mark altogether…because the Spirit pokes and prods me often, reminding me of all the opportunities I had to give love and either didn’t, or demonstrated the opposite of love.  All the harm I have done, all the selfish humanness I hold on to. 

And while the Spirit does point these things out, the Spirit does something else…reminds me of the grace that surrounds me.  The grace that covers a multitude of sins, of mess ups, of errors committed by accident or with calculation…grace that carries me, and carries you, and carries us all….

That, brings me peace.  That, settles the troubles in my heart.  That abates my deepest fears and calms my inadequacy.  And we are given this Grace by one who gives freely, openly, without conditions or limits or any of the ways you and I of this world might give. 

And for that, thanks be to God.